Rainy Day...

I woke up this morning to the mosque...and RAIN! I LOVE being able to hear the rain so well. It has only rained a little here so far- but today it rained all day. It was nice. We got some down time as a family- much to Matthew's dismay. He was so antsy to get outside and play. I really am so nervous about what is going to happen when we get back to Jacksonville and have no yard for him to play in. He has discovered the outside and fallen in love since we've been here. It keeps him entertained and wears him out too- so I love it as well. :) I made a delicious meal tonight that was simple, but made with American things and really hit the spot. Matthew even ate a whole round of seconds! We also got to FaceTime with some people we really love today- Grandma and Papa, Pops and Milly, Daddy, and Mr. Anthony! This also resulted in a few tears from me. I realized today that I haven't even been here a month and still have over a month until we are back with those we love. I love it here- but wish I could somehow combine both worlds.



I also had another moment of tears tonight as I fed Jonathan. I feed him his last bottle after the other two go to bed and it is the sweetest time. He has a few little scars on his body and as he held my hand while I fed him I was looking at the scars and realizing I will NEVER know what they are from. I will NEVER know what pain he endured in the first 6 months of his life. When he was sick and being poked at the hospital in the first few days of his life (as I have experienced being here and at the doctor with all 3 boys)- no one was holding him to comfort him and wishing the pain away. There was no face of love looking down at him, talking sweetly to him, and holding him tight- reassuring him that everything was going to be ok. As his little fingers held my hand tight tonight my heart was broken thinking about how someone else missed out on these moments with him. It brought a million questions about birth parents to my mind that once again will NEVER be answered this side of Heaven. I love him with all of my heart and am SO grateful to have the opportunity to be his mommy- but I am so sad about the circumstances for him that brought this about. I am praying like crazy already for grace and wisdom from God when questions start to be asked. I want him to know that I love him the hardest and deepest of anyone- and though that won't wipe away all pain I am praying that it is known without a shadow of a doubt and can give security and a safe place when he needs to hurt.



Ugh...enough of that. I'm crying again.



One very important thing!! Please go check this out! http://adoptedprints.com AMAZING! My sweet friend has been working on this for a while and it is READY! I can't wait to make one for Jonathan. My friend has adopted twice (so far-hehe) and is one of the most talented people I know- it's kind of ridiculous actually. Haha. I want one or more of EVERYTHING she makes- no exaggeration. She made the sweetest little brown Jonathan doll for our boy that we brought to Africa with us. It's adorable! Please check it out and share with anyone you may think would be interested!



Here are a few pictures from our day (and last nights party).

YUMMY!

Matthew and his buddy watching Mickey Mouse Christmas something...they are clearly in the zone.

The gang excited about hot chocolate and marshmallows

We did some more coloring today

I have been saving toilet paper rolls since we got here so we could make this nativity.

I'm glad they seem to be interested in playing with the tree.

Our final product. The boys both colored a few- I ended up coloring more than planned. Haha. It was good therapy during nap time though.

Andrew is obsessed with people's eyes- mostly poking them. This is a typical sight with him.

He was laughing at my singing tonight at dinner- I decided not to have hurt feelings and take a picture of the cuteness instead. 

I'm not sure how this kid is getting so big! I have some ridiculously handsome men in my family!!

Thankful for a TRUE God

To start with today and then give an update on the past few days...



I went to a meeting at the US Embassy today. It is something they host each month to give updates on what is happening with the adoption process in Uganda. It was good. Nothing monumental...but good to go to. The Embassy "campus" is BEAUTIFUL! My driver told me that Americans know how to make things nice. It is true. We are good at going above and beyond for looks! :) Sometimes that's good-sometimes it's terrible. Haha. It led us into a conversation about how I thought different things about Uganda are beautiful and things we don't have in America. He thought some of the things were crazy because they are so normal to him. We had a great conversation about how creative God is- and how LITTLE we know about Him the more we learn. One thing I LOVE the most about going different places is seeing different things God has created and fashioned that are not in the area I usually live. The CD that was on in the car was a Passion cd. Both of us sang along as we drove through crazy Kampala traffic. I know this is a terrible description of it all but it was such a sweet worship moment. I can't wait to see God! We are all made in His image...and I look WAY different than Ugandans...or Chinese...or Norwegians- and yet all of us are created in His image. I can't wait to see how beautiful and complex He is. Worship is really my only response to even thinking about that reality- I can't imagine when it is made real! I'm so thankful to be loved by a God that I don't have to earn favor with- that was proactive in a plan to redeem me to Himself. I pass a mosque on my way to and from anywhere here because it is right near our house. EVERY SINGLE TIME I get a feeling of emptiness looking at it. It is completely empty and looks so unloving and uninviting. I am so sad for those that go day after day seeking the approval of someone that will never be enough to save them. I'm thankful for my adoption. My heart is so full of worship in the most unconventional ways here. I really wish there was a way to write how my heart feels here-but I can't seem to find the words. I am content in the chaos.



On Monday I went early in the morning with Jonathan to the passport "office". It is actually a tent outside with benches underneath it and 5 desks at the front with immigration officers working at them. You literally have to fight your way to one of the chairs in front of their desk to get your file seen. Once again I am so thankful for being raised in a culture where the concept of a line was absurd and it is not actually rude to push and shove- it is necessity. I sat and observed for a bit to get a feel for the process and then jumped right in and got my baby boys file seen so he can get a passport! :) Now we wait (maybe a few weeks- maybe sooner- you never know) for it to arrive so we can do the last steps with the US Embassy to leave Uganda with our boy.



Monday also held Jonathan's last IV appointment at the doctor. I am SO thankful to God for His provision of Dr. Susan! We met her at the hospital with Matthew which has lead us to appointments for the other boys as well. We are now going to a clinic she works at that is more private and is AMAZING! Room for Andrew to run- literally no one else in the office. They show up when WE are available to come. She even called me today to see how Jonathan was doing! The blessings are overflowing. He has some more oral meds we are taking at home and then we go for the recheck on Saturday. Pray for his cough to completely go away. This seems to be something that the babies from the orphanage struggle with. He doesn't seem too bothered by it, but I want his body to be healthy! He has slept through the night for the past 3 nights!!



We also moved on Monday to 2 units down from where we were. We moved AWAY from the noisy restaurant and I am SO happy! :) We also now share a backyard with the other family that has little boys here. Matthew is one happy camper.



So thankful to have survived Monday. It held a lot and was very exhausting, but I thought today as I drove back from the embassy that I was afraid of all Monday would hold but here I am and it's Tuesday and I survived. God's mercies are new every morning. I am experiencing that in such a real way here. He truly gives me no more than what I can handle, and I can only handle things in His power. I'm happy to be putting the Holy Spirit to extra use. I think that is part of the reason I feel so satisfied here. I NEED God- and even though that usually means a little tougher life- it is far more fulfilling because that is how we are created to live! I can set up for myself a pretty easy comfortable life in America sometimes- Uganda will stretch you past your ability to hold it together!



Tomorrow holds nothing so far. :) Today I made cheese blintz- a Christmas tradition for us. I was so happy to find cream cheese here (which I was told didn't exist) and was able to make them! They are a little crumbly because the bread here is that way- but I am SO happy to have a bit of tradition here with us. We have been doing different fun things with the two other families here to help us feel Christmassy. Tonight we ordered pizza (so yummy!) because it is BOGO on Tuesday. We usually always eat together which is so fun. Then we watched lots of Mickey Christmas movies and had hot chocolate with marshmallows (a surprise find at the store today!)!! I also had found a Betty Crocker chocolate chip muffin mix here! It was almost too much goodness for my tummy to handle! I left my camera at the neighbors so I will post the pictures later- not that you will be that impressed with them because they are normal things in America- but they are CELEBRATED here! :)



Jonathan is THRIVING! Love looks good on him. The boys are SO great with him. They LOVE to play with him and he smiles at the constantly! Andrew has been really fun today. Goofy, sweet, and fairly obedient. :) Matthew is having the time of his life with his new friends. We are struggling a bit with him having to remember that mommy's requests trump friend's requests. Melt downs usually happen about 15 minutes before dinner is ready. Tomorrow I am going to pull him in for a little down time in the afternoon- hopefully that will help. Today was better than yesterday so I hope I can say the same thing tomorrow. We miss daddy. The boys LOVE to see him on FaceTime. They are always poking their big ol' heads in the way of each other so I'm sure Adam's view isn't that great- but they want to make sure they get daddy time! :) 2 more weeks until he's back!

December 6, 2013

Something important happened on the continent of Africa this past Friday December 6th. Many people will think that I'm talking about the death of Nelson Mandela. My friends will know I'm talking about something else...

The day started like normal. Me tired. The boys somehow fully rested after what seems like not enough hours of sleep to me. Breakfast. Getting dressed. And the playing begins. I was rushing around a little crazier than usual trying to make myself presentable. Thankfully we had electricity for me to straighten the hair I had slept on wet the night before. I did everything possible before putting on my outfit for court so it wouldn't get ruined by food, snot, spit up or poop. I'm happy to say none of those things ruined my clothes! :) 

Jonathan however slept. And slept. And slept. At the very last minute I woke him up and dressed him in his handsome little outfit. He was happy. And oblivious. The driver arrived and I ran out the door with him. My sweet friend watched the other two boys at home for me. As we drove through Kampala it was rainy. This was a blessing because it meant that many people were still inside and not on the street!! I fed Jonathan his bottle and he was as happy as could be. As we drove all of a sudden a mob of butterflies attacked my stomach. At least that's what it felt like. I had not been nervous up until that point but as we approached the court house the reality started to hit me (in the chaos of just getting through the morning) that Jonathan would become legally my son on that very day! I kept telling him over and over that today was a special day for him, and that today he would become a son and would no longer be an orphan!

When we arrived at the court house I was 45 minutes early for our court appointment. I sat and stood and paced with Jonathan in my carrier. I was the only person in the waiting room for the majority of the time. I had woken up with a little cold and had chugged a bottle of emergen-c before I left the house hoping it would give me a little extra immune boost. I'm not sure it did that, but it did make me have to go to the bathroom. I figured I shouldn't try holding it since court went 1 1/2 hours longer than expected the last time. I asked the guard where the bathroom was and she told me to follow the hallway all the way down until the last door on the right. I came to what I thought was the last door before the cleaning closet, and then I realized it was actually past that and in what I thought was a cleaning closet. There was a men's sign on the door, but it was the only one I saw. The door was open and no one was in there so I carried on. I chose the bigger stall and attempted to lock the door. The lock didn't seem very sturdy, but I thought I got it enough to keep it closed while I went to the bathroom. Jonathan was still in the carrier and I tried to hike up my skirt and squat with all the thigh muscles I have over the toilet without touching it! It was a success. I re-situated my clothes, making sure everything was covered before I walked back out into society. I took a few pictures for you all...haha. And then I decided to leave. I tried to turn the lock and it wouldn't budge. I tired a few more times with different techniques. Nothing. Apparently the lock I didn't think would do it's job was now working overtime. I heard some men outside the door (maybe it was a mens bathroom after all) and decided I better not waste too much time trying to figure it out on my own incase I never actually did and then was stranded at the end of this hallway with no help until who knows when. I knocked on the door and the guy immediately said, "are you stuck?" Haha. It must be a common thing. I said yes and he said ok...I'm coming to help. This door was an actual door. No crawling under the door (not that I would've done that even if it had been an option- I actually was considering how to kick in a door from the inside). The walls were almost all the way to the ceiling with just a little space at the top. My rescuer came up over the wall and down into the stall with me. Why oh why is this adventure not being video taped?! He jiggled the handle a while. Thankfully he didn't get it unlocked right away- then I would've felt really stupid. Eventually he got it open and I said many thank you's and walked out. As I walked down the hallway I could not wipe the smile off my face. I was so thankful that this was another story of this adventure. It seemed to fit so perfectly into it. It took everything for me to not giggle actually. 

What I had to work with. I touched nothing except the lock and used many clorox wipes. At least it was a toilet and I didn't have to squat all the way to the floor. Been there, done that...don't want to try it carrying a baby.

The view from the bathroom.

As I arrived back at the waiting room, still no one was there. I walked, sat, stood some more. My lawyer showed up and said the judge was busy with another case and we would have to wait. Wait wait wait. Jonathan was great. So happy and sweet. As usual.

Eventually it was our turn! The judge we had was SO kind to us during our first court date. I was really hoping it would be the same during our ruling date. I had prayed for good health for her, for not traffic jams etc. so that she would be in court that day! God answered my prayers and she was there. And she was SO kind again. In the court room it was the judge, her two helpers (not sure of their official titles- but they were so kind to us too!), my lawyer, Jonathan and I. 

We started with her asking how Jonathan was doing, where the other boys were, how we were all doing etc etc... I was so happy that she was so personally interested in our family and how we were doing. Then she officially started our time together and read through the ruling. A ruling includes who the child is, their story, who we are, and if we are suited to be parents to this child. Then they read if they give you guardianship of them and the specifics of that. As she started to read I hung on every word. I wish I could've recorded it! These words she was reading were the words that officially change the status of Jonathan from orphan to SON! YOU GUYS!! THIS IS AMAZING! I was sad that our whole family couldn't be present. I was sad that Adam didn't get to hear the judge declare that he is ours. I also felt like it was that special moment after delivering a child and MOM gets the first rights to hold the new baby. Jonathan was so happy and squirmy. I kept looking into his eyes thinking- you have NO idea what is happening and PRAISE the LORD that you are too young to know. How GRACIOUS of HIM. So the judge declared that she found us to be equipped and qualified to be Jonathan's parents! That we are allowed to take him back to America...and a bunch of other things. :) MY HEART FELT LIKE IT WAS TRYING TO FLY OUT OF ME! The smile on my face was probably ridiculous. I looked at our lawyer when she said that and he smiled and nodded at me to let me know it's really real!

After she was done reading the ruling the judge put down the paper and just started talking with me. I really felt like I was talking to a friend. I have the utmost respect for this woman, but it also felt so normal to me to be able to talk with her about my SON! She told me that she too loved Jonathan. If your mouth didn't drop to the floor then (it should've) then it better after what you read next... she asked if she could hold him?! THIS DOES NOT HAPPEN!! I OF COURSE said YES! So I walked up behind her desk (WHAT?!) and handed him to her. Then I squatted next to her as she snuggled with him... not just held him but snuggled with him! We talked some more, like old friends. Honestly- I wish you could hear me say these things- I'M STILL FREAKING OUT WRITING THIS!

I had really wanted a picture with the judge because of how gracious and wonderful she was to us and Jonathan. I didn't know how to go about such a thing or if it was a possibility. God flung that door wide open for me! As I was next to her I asked if she would mind if I took a picture of her and Jonathan? She said that would be ok. I looked at my lawyer who seemed a bit caught off guard and he said ok. I took the picture and we talked a few more minutes and then it was time for me to leave. 

As I went to the waiting room to wait for the lawyer to finish things up I told my driver and social worker about what had happened. Their mouths DID drop and they were surprised at each new thing I said. She loves him...WHAT?! She wanted to hold him...WHAT?! She let me take a picture of her with him... THAT HAS NEVER HAPPENED EVER!! THANK YOU LORD FOR SUCH A GIFT! The lawyer said that no one had ever taken a picture with a judge before. I'm not really sure why God is so gracious to me, and I'm SO thankful that He clearly is CRAZY about Jonathan. The story that we have seen that He has written for our son already is unbelievable. I'm so excited to be able to print this picture for the judge so she can keep it and remember this sweet boy she fell in love with and how thankful his family is for her kindness to us!

As we drove home I kept saying to Jonathan- You're my son!! It is a reality that has been true in my heart since the day I saw his picture for the first time, but I am so happy it is legally true now too. I had a sweet talk with our social worker in the car about how amazing it was and how awesome it is to think about our adoption into God's family during every step of this process. I'm so thankful to learn more about MY spiritual adoption through our adoption of Jonathan. 

When we got home we had a couple of hours before we went out with our friends to dinner. It was a great restaurant with "muzungu (white people) food" as the Ugandans kept describing it to us as. The setting was fabulous! Large space for the kids to run around. Shaded area for moms to sit and talk. A fun end to a phenomenal day. 

Such a pretty place huh? All the kids were washing off sand box (aka red clay) filth before dinner.

Alone doesn't feel so alone with these ladies here with me! PS- check out that burger! It had cheese AND bacon. 

I had posted on Facebook that it was official because I knew I wouldn't have enough time to sit down and write all this out that day. The amount of people that showed excitement for us was so overwhelming to me! People I haven't talked to in years- that I didn't even know they followed what we were doing in our family. It was sweet to be reminded of them, and to see such support. I have tried to keep an account of this journey on this blog as best as I could so that I would have a good record of all that God has done. I hope that some of you have been able to keep up with it and praise God with us for His faithfulness. God's faithfulness screams out OVER AND OVER AND OVER again at every turn of this story! The PERFECT journey He has taken my heart on was tailor made for me and I couldn't be more thankful. Not everything has been easy, or happy, but it has been perfect in His plan. 

Thank you for your prayers. Please keep them up. We will still be here a while as all the paperwork/passport etc gets in line for Jonathan to be able to leave Uganda with us. It seems like a big hurry up and wait game which is tiring and hard. Especially with three children alone here. I have a passport interview on Monday at 8 AM (which means I have to leave much earlier than I normally get moving) and I will leave my other two behind to play again. Not sure exactly what happens at this step, but I know it's a good thing we have it so soon. :) I took Andrew and Jonathan for their rechecks today at the wonderful doctor that is taking care of them. Andrew got the ok and Jonathan got an iv of antibiotics. His cough is getting worse and moving towards a bronchitis type thing so they are doing iv antibiotics over the next 3 days. This means we have to go back to the office at the same time for the next 2 days. Thankfully it is at a good time for our schedule and the traffic schedule. 2 days isn't that long, and I'm so thankful it wasn't something that required staying in the hospital. I'm not really sure how I would swing that with Matthew and Andrew too! God provided the other clinic that the doctor works at that is small, quiet, clean, and fast, so we don't have to do the hospital scene anymore. PRAISE! On Monday at 8 AM I am supposed to be at my passport interview, then at 2 I am supposed to have Jonathan at the doctor. That sounds like a big range of time, but not in Africa.  I also am moving apartments that day. It is something I have known about, but seems to fall on a "bad" day. I know it will get done and be fine, but please pray for stamina, grace with Matthew especially (his sass is pushing my limits the past few days), and no traffic, fast appointments, and anything else you think we will need! Pray that this antibiotic will take care of Jonathan's problem. He was on one at home first and it didn't do anything, so I really would LOVE to have 3 healthy boys and no more doctor visits. :) My sweet friend Hellen came by for about 3 minutes today and brought us fruit! YUMMY! She has been so sweet and taken such good care of us even in the hectic schedule she keeps at her job. God is good to me. She says I look like I've lost weight- I told her thank you- she told me that wasn't a good thing. Crackers, grilled cheese, and apples must not be a good diet. Haha.

I'm going to take some nyquil for my cold and hopefully get lots of sleep before the boys get up! There is some birthday party at the restaurant tonight so we will see if I can actually sleep. When I move apartments I won't be next to the restaurant and parking lot anymore. I will be in the farthest corner and am excited for hopefully a little more quiet! Goodnight sweet friends.

"Is he yours?!"

Just a quick update and a few more pictures. Today was good. Got all my chores done pretty quickly. The lizard hasn't killed me yet, though I'm not sure where it ended up so anxiety may be the end of me. The boys were pretty good- Andrew took a great nap for the first time since we've been here. Thank you Jesus. We got to go to dinner at a Mexican restaurant here- The Little Donkey. I got dressed in something that sort of matched, put on make up, sort of did my hair, and put on a necklace-which quickly came off because Jonathan tried to strange me with it from the Ergo (all rare things for me to do here by the way) for this special occasion. We were supposed to go a while ago while Adam was still here but when all the sickness hit it didn't work out. My mind has been thinking of guacamole since I first heard of this place though and I couldn't wait to go!! It did not disappoint. I had a chicken quesadilla dipped in sour cream and some guacamole and chips. This may sound normal to you- but this was quite the treat here! After dinner one lady brought all the other kids home to watch a movie and the other lady and I went to the store (with Andrew and Jonathan). I wish I had a video of the three of us ladies trying to carry on a conversation at dinner with the 10 kids we were all responsible for. At the end of our time (and maybe our rope) a couple came into the restaurant (probably on a date) and sat at the only other table in the little room with us. I felt so bad for them- I'm sure they were happy when we finally cleared out! :)



Tomorrow I have our ruling at court. It's at 10 AM (thankfully I don't have to leave too early) our time which is 2 AM your time Jacksonville (incase you feel lead to wake up and pray- haha). The other ladies are so kind to watch Matthew and Andrew so I don't have to take them with me. Please pray with us as we hope to hear that we have been granted guardianship of Jonathan and are able to bring him back to America. I was thinking on the way home tonight how crazy it is that all of this process will hopefully be finalized tomorrow. The judge will declare him my son. In my heart that is what he already is but it will be SO exciting to have it official. It is really interesting here because a lot of people will look at me strangely (trying to squeeze in some sort of awkward kindness at the same time) and say, "is he yours too?" And I smile and say yes. EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM has replied, "no he's not." I have to explain that we adopted him, but SO WHAT that his skin is different. HE IS MINE and don't tell me he's not. I feel like they are probably asking if he's mine biologically but honestly why would you have to ask and then argue with me about my answer? Just the beginning of what is to come I'm sure. I fully expected strange looks in America but I totally forgot that we would stick out even more here!! I am one proud momma though and I beam when I get to tell them that YES he is mine.



Here are a few pictures to follow up on what I posted yesterday...

First song of the day he crawled on the coffee table and whipped out his dancing fingers. I had to take a picture to show you!

I took this from my kitchen window. Roofing in Uganda. I was for sure that at any moment this man was going to slide right off the roof on his sled he was sitting on! 

I took this from the boys bedroom window today. They went to the side yard to play together without me. I love that they play well together. It made me so sad that they didn't need me though. 

Matthew was writing A's today. And was staying inside the lines on these ones. It took much concentration as you can tell from his tongue. We colored a little craft today too and without me saying anything he colored in the lines and was so proud to show me. Maybe my suggestion yesterday did register with him. I came home tonight to a crazy scribbled coloring paper though and it made my heart happy. 

A Day in THE Life

I really am enjoying life here SO much. A lot of people would probably think I'm insane. That's fine. Haha. I grew up with life like this. My heart really feels at home in the most unexplainable way when I am in a setting like this.



Today was good. Andrew seems to be getting better. He gave me lots of smiles today. Only cried twice instead of every other second like he has been lately. We played with toys a lot. We had a few dance parties. Apparently I dance with my pointer fingers pointed. Andrew now dances with his hands like that and shows me very proudly every time. The things you learn in the mirror of children. :) I'm fairly certain I have better rhythm than him. It wouldn't take much though. Watching him dance is one of my highest forms of entertainment. One of Matthew's little friends came over for a while. I attempted to teach Matthew how to color inside the lines...not too interested. I told him it looked better than when he just scribbled like a crazy person all over the place. He cracked up at that. Whatever I guess. He will learn eventually. Haha. Kids got baths. We ate 3 meals again...sort of... dinner didn't seem to be too big of a hit. I am trying out all sorts of things I found at the store here. Some are good. Some are...well...gross. I made bran muffins from a mix. I added a cut up apple. They were yummy.



OH MY GOSH! MID TYPING I SAW A LIZARD WALK ACROSS THE LIVING ROOM FLOOR!! THEY ARE MY WORST NIGHTMARE!! SEND ME HOME!! But seriously... that is by far the worst moment of my trip so far. Ugh..........help.



I have a few pictures to share from our day (and a few in the past). I figured you may enjoy some of the little traits of Jonathan that we love. I hope you enjoy the little sneak peek at him. I'm also putting in some pictures of stuff around here too. And a little of our Christmas decorating time before Adam left.

Coloring!

When I said scribble like a crazy person I wasn't exaggerating.

Letter to Santa! He asked for a talking Buzz Lightyear and a James train.

Matthew's favorite ornament

Thank you Hobby Lobby for having Christmas stuff out basically at the end of summer! 99 cent stockings for us to hang on our indoor clothes line.

Decorating our tree. Please don't judge my craftiness too harshly.

My washer...

And dryer. 

This is my laundry room. And you can see my clothes hamper. You can't let it be too big or laundry piles up and I feel overwhelmed. The bottles are our new favorite toys as you will see in a few pictures. So we keep all of them. 

Sometimes his cuteness is too much for me to handle.

DJ Matthew loves to pick our songs on his little computer for us to dance to.

THAT BELLY!!

He has the longest fingers and toes.

There was a fly bothering Andrew. It was hilarious to watch him figure out what was happening.

He figures out new ways to hold more every day.

Another adorable belly.

Our feet are stained red from the Ugandan clay. 

My heart is so full when these two play together like best buddies. They were off on an adventure with their bottles. 

During our back porch dance party/play time/photo shoot our friends brought us some treats!! 

Andrew wasn't sure how exactly to eat this thing. His concerned face cracks me up. n

Hope you enjoyed some pictures. Thank you for praying for us. We had electricity all day!! You must have been praying every time you used electricity. It kept dipping and rising. Lights would fade and then shine bright. There is a house being built right across from us (it is so neat to watch the progress since we've been here and to see how they do construction) and every time they used whatever tool they used all day the power would go way down. Pretty amusing. Adam is home and we got to FaceTime with him today. I'm so thankful for how far technology has come and how helpful it is to stay in contact with loved ones far away. Jonathan even smiled when he saw Adam on the screen. Anyone else we have FT he has big scared eyes. He LOVES his daddy. I'm off to wash off the red clay and hop in bed. The lady that helps keep the houses clean around here changed all our sheets today. I can't wait to lay down in a clean bed!! Hopefully the party people at the restaurant right by our window aren't too out of control tonight. Goodnight! 

And then there were 5...

SOOOO much to write! We are in Uganda...but let me back up a bit to catch up to where we are now.



Two weeks before we left my mom (and dad for a few days) came to visit. Adam left for the entire week before we flew out to teach at a Bible school in Colorado. My mom was AMAZING! If it weren't for her I probably would have been crying in the middle of my living room floor surrounded by the things I needed to pack and the kids I needed to take care of. I LOVED getting to spend time with her because I hadn't seen her since June. I also am so thankful for all the help she was to me. She even cleaned my whole house before we left while I was out running errands one day.



So... Adam was in Colorado and was supposed to fly home late Thursday night and get back around 9 Friday morning. Our flight out to Uganda was at 1:50 that afternoon. We were praying for good weather and perfect timing. God was gracious in allowing that to happen. We drove to the airport and met Adam. He put his Colorado bag in the car and picked up his Uganda one I had packed for him. We checked in and headed to our gate. The boys were so excited to watch airplanes take off and land!



My mom was flying out the same time as us to go back home. When it came time to say goodbye to her it was really hard. Andrew gave her the sweetest longest hug. He really connected with her during her time with us and of course I started to cry. We really wanted my mom to be able to come to Uganda to experience all of this with us for part of the time, and to help with the 3 weeks Adam will be gone but it was too expensive. It was really sad for me to say goodbye to her and know that I was about to go do something really life changing and she wasn't going to be a part of it. Just like I wanted her there for the birth of Matthew and Andrew- I really wanted her to be a part of the beginning of Jonathan's life with us. I'm feeling a little better about that not being able to happen- but that was a hard moment for me.



We flew to Brussells. There were lots of African men on our flight. I have no idea if they were from Uganda or not but all I could think about when I saw them was, "Is that what Jonathan is going to look like as a man?!" So crazy! Andrew and I were seat buddies and he only wanted to sleep in my arms (first time in his life). My arms were so SORE! At Walmart before we left we were standing at the 88 cent bucket of medicine and an old lady came up and got some muscle rub and told me it was the most amazing thing ever. Since I had been the one picking up the suitcases over and over again to weigh them my back was already hurting so I figured I might as well try it for that price! I was thankful for that choice after holding Andrew on all those flights. My arms and shoulders were in bad shape.



We had a layover in Rwanda. We had to stay on the airplane for an hour! I was really not looking forward to this. The kids had done pretty well... Andrew was melting down from lack of sleep and another hour of airplane time without gaining any distance was not something I was excited about. Thankfully Adam and his mom (who got to come with us for the first 2 weeks here) took over and I got to spread out in a row of seats for that hour and sleep. It was JUST what I needed. I was starting to feel awful and almost panicky from my need of sleep! As a mom I'm amazed at what I keep learning my body can do on so little sleep! Haha



We had a short flight from Rwanda to Uganda and then our trip was really about to begin!! As we walked off the airplane I could hardly believe that our feet were touching the ground our son is from! We walked into the terminal and I kept having to hold back tears thinking that I was so close to Jonathan after being so far away for so long! I kept thanking God for His faithfulness and provision.



We were shown favor by the visa officials and got to cut to the front of one of the lines with our children and carry ons! Waiting in line was not something I saw going well with the amount of sleep both the boys were working with. And then all our luggage made it! YIPPEE! The boys did so great. Of course at points it was what you would expect traveling internationally with children- but they were troopers! Matthew asked Adam on our way out of the airport if he missed his friend from Dunkin Donuts (a black guy) because he saw all the black people around us. His little heart is so sweet sometimes!



We loaded ourselves and our luggage into the car and started our drive "home"-which was about an hour away. There are no carseats here though so the boys were happy to get in!



As we drove out of the airport I felt like I was back in Indonesia (except the weather is much more pleasant here!) The median curbs were painted black and white stripes just like the airport there. The signs all look the same as far as the design and the smells... honestly I wanted to bottle them. They may not be to other people's liking but to me they mean home. I think I breathed DEEP breaths the whole drive. It's a mixture burning trash and street food. Throw up if you want...I was excited! :) As we drove all of a sudden I realized that it was 1 in the morning and there were people EVERYWHERE! You would've thought the sun had just gone down! Andrew was asleep next to me and had been eating animal crackers. Slowly I felt them slip from his hands and the best part was when minutes later I heard him crunch one that was in his mouth mid sleep! He was a tired boy!



Matthew turned around from the seat in front of me and kept asking me how I was doing. He was holding my hand and telling me he was so excited to be in Uganda. I just wanted to squeeze him! So precious.



As we drove I kept thinking about how thankful I was that we were getting to experience this as a whole family. I am so grateful to those that gave money to make this whole journey possible. This is a big page in our family's book and I'm so thankful that we are here together.



Just to let you know- I wrote that first part a few days after being in country. It has been a few weeks now and life has been hectic. I have not had a single moment to sit down and type up anything! I wish I had because I would've been able to recall more specific details- but I am treasuring things up in my heart.



After we arrived at the guest house we are at we let the boys play for a while. Time zone, airplane sitting time, and excitement about finally being here meant a 3 am bed time. We didn't arrive until around 1 am if that makes you feel any better. I was up at 5:15 with a HORRIBLE headache. I took some medicine and as soon as my head started feeling better all I wanted to do was go explore! :) I waited a while and finally went outside to look around. This country is beautiful! The place we are staying is like a retreat in the chaos of Kampala. The temperature here is perfection. I got to meet some of the mysterious Facebook friends I had been communicating with for months. It was like seeing old friends not meeting them for the first time. My heart is so full here. When everyone else got up Adam and I went to exchange some money, but a little cell phone, and get a few groceries. Everywhere we go here we have a driver. It sounds fancy...but it would be suicide to try to drive anywhere by ourselves! The traffic is nuts and we would have no idea where we are going! After we brought the groceries home we got in the car and headed out to the orphanage. Adam's mom is with us and stayed with the boys so they wouldn't have to make the long trip. It was 6 hours to get there. Both of us fell asleep almost as soon as we got in the car. It was good to catch up on a little bit of sleep. I was running on about 5 hours of sleep in 3 days! At one point I woke up and looked outside the car window. We were in the more mountainous part of Uganda and it was BEAUTIFUL! We arrived at the little hotel we would stay at the two nights we were there. We checked in and then our driver told us we were going to the orphanage. It was 7ish at night and we knew that was too late to show up and see Jonathan. He said we could go meet the sisters (nuns) that ran the place that night. We were excited to get a chance to talk to them after all the kids were already in bed. We were hoping to learn all we could about our little boy!



When we got there I was excited. I couldn't believe that I was in the same place as Jonathan. I knew I wouldn't see him, but I was strangely at peace about that. I was a little worried I wasn't going to sleep again that night with excitement, but I was so happy to finally be there! We met the sisters and they were so kind. It was fun to talk to them and hear a little about the program and our little boy. They have 40 plus children at this home right now. 3 sisters run the place and there are 17 mamas that care for the children. Half of them work during the day and half at night. That is A LOT of work! As we sat there one of the mamas came in holding JONATHAN!!! I immediately started crying... and I'm actually crying again right now thinking about it. It was not at all how I imagined meeting my son. It was so surprising! We weren't supposed to be allowed to see him that night! I stood up and took him from the mama. I tried not to scare him, but also wanted to touch each little body part of his that I had stared at in pictures for so long and wondered about! He just stared at us with his BIG wide eyes. I held him for a while and talked to him and cried. The sisters laughed at me a little but I didn't care at all. The way I met my son was not at all what I imagined but it was absolutely perfect. I passed him off to Adam eventually. Jonathan peed on him right away! Haha. Diapers are not a thing at the home. We had to say goodbye to him after just a little bit, but it wasn't nearly as torturous as I thought it would be. I was so thankful for such a sweet surprise of meeting him early! And I knew the next morning we would be back to take him with us forever!!



The next morning I woke up at 3 I think. Excited and jet lagged. Eventually I could get up and eat breakfast and our driver came to get us. When we got to the home it was buzzing with activity. The children were awake and they were getting started for the day. They do the same cycle over and over...feed-clean-dress-play-feed-clean-sleep. There are MANY wardrobe changes in there since there are no diapers. They start with a big pile of clean clothes and as a child dirties a set they take them off and throw them in a dirty pile and pick whatever is off the top of the clean pile to put on them. As I watched these ladies care for these orphans I was amazed at their hard work and their care for them. What an exhausting thankless job. I was so overwhelmed as I met these women that I have prayed for for so long. It gave me more specifics to pray for in the future for them. They love those children well with the most minimal resources. Soon after we got there Jonathan woke up and they brought him to us. I put a diaper on him right away! :) We basically sat around the home the whole day. I was thankful to have time to observe life there and take in details to some day share with Jonathan. We went back to the hotel for lunch, but didn't have enough time to eat so we took a little nap on the bed with our new son! Amazing. Then we went to the probation officer and got foster care of Jonathan so we could bring him back to the city for court. We took some gifts back to the home for the sisters. Some of the gifts were things people had sent with us from America. It was so fun getting to share with them that so many people so far away were praying for them and thankful for them! We also got them some big bags of rice and sugar. Our driver told us it would be a huge blessing to them.



I was very concerned for a few weeks before we left that I was going to be totally upsetting Jonathan's world by coming into it. I was worried that the sisters would have a hard time saying goodbye to a baby they have cared for. God was so gracious in making it obvious that this is the best thing that could happen to Jonathan. That may sound crazy to you- but they were very real feelings for me. I kept telling the ladies there how thankful I was for their care of him and how I had prayed for them. They kept thanking us for giving him a home and a family that will love him. Everyone kept saying, "Jonathan has a family!" I drove away from the home at complete peace. We spent the night in the town one more night because it is too dangerous to drive at night. We had to get back in the routine of waking up in the middle of the night to change a diaper and feed a baby! He is an angel though and only woke up once!



We drove home the next morning. The 6 hours back with him was great. He is so easy going. I was SO excited to get home to be together as a whole family! Adam and I had a plan for how to introduce him to the boys. That plan didn't happen at all. :) As soon as we pulled up the boys came running outside excited to see us and meet Jonathan! It was sweet and perfect!



The next day we met with our lawyer to get an idea of what court would be like. Then on Thursday the 21st (Adam's birthday) we had our court date. I wish there was some way to type what my stomach felt like. It was horrible! We had to leave early which was hard for all the boys. We sat in African traffic for a while which had my stomach in even more knots! We were supposed to arrive at 8:30 because our case was at 9. When the clock hit 8:30 and we were still on the road I was a mess! I had no idea where we were or how close we were. At 8:33 we pulled in the gate and I felt a little better. We went upstairs and waited to be called in. My stomach continued to feel worse and worse as the judge asked the witnesses questions etc. The boys were getting squirmy and we weren't allowed to have toys, books, drinks, or snacks with us! We were told we would be in there about 40 minutes. I was praying like crazy!! Some of the witnesses at our case were the two men that found Jonathan. I had NO idea they would be there and it was such a blessing to get to meet them!! They were so caring and excited to see Jonathan. I cried as I heard their account of finding him. God greatly protected our son and used these two men in an amazing way. Treasures in my heart. As it came time for the judge to ask us questions Adam stood up to be introduced. I turned my head to the left to look at him and as soon as I did that Andrew cannon ball rolled out of his chair to my right onto the tile floor right on his face! Everyone gasped and I was sure we would be denied anymore children ever!! The sound was horrible and his screaming started!! They let Adam's mom take him out which was another blessing. 1- that she was there to be able to help with that. 2- that he didn't have to sit in that room any longer! :) My mom suggested maybe God pushed him out of the chair. Haha. As the judge asked us questions my stomach started to calm down. She was SO very kind to us. She asked Matthew some questions and he did GREAT! (We had practiced a lot so I'm so thankful!!) I really feel like we got to have good dialogue with her about Jonathan's future, how we will address certain questions, and that she got a real feel for what life in our family is like, and what we value. God is so good. At the beginning of the time in court Jonathan had a MASSIVE diaper blow out! Then fell asleep! We put a burp cloth under him and just held him. Remember when I said court was supposed to be about 40 minutes... well it turned into about 2 hours!! Thankfully Andrew fell out of the chair and got to leave. Matthew did so great and Jonathan slept most of the time. When he woke up and fussed the judge let me leave to change him because our time was over. I kept telling her thank you so much. I am so so so grateful for how God ordained our judge, our court time, and Jonathan's whole story. We got a date set to go back for her ruling. December 6.



We had to take pictures with the men and the sister and as a family before I could change Jonathan because I had forgotten to bring a change of clothes...of course. Not sure how on my 3rd baby I could make such a rookie mistake! Haha. Most of our pictures are not the best because the boys were tired, Jonathan had poop everywhere and was fussy and we were all ready to get home! We can't share them on here until we are back in America unfortunately. :(



We got home and chilled out for a while. That night we had dinner with our adoption friends at the restaurant on campus for Adam's birthday. I used the gas stove without a thermometer to make brownies for him. They turned out alright. It's quite the guessing game. :) I also added Reeses  in the shape of 29 since we didn't have candles and they are Adam's favorites. It didn't look so good, but it tasted great. :)

Friday was our first full day home with Jonathan as 5 Alexanders. He had a bad stuffy nose so we took him to a clinic here. Everything here takes extra time so that took up most of our day and we were basically told to do nose drops... Saturday night Matthew woke up moaning terribly and crunched over in what looked like stomach pain. Back to the clinic we went in the middle of the night. Thankfully we had been there the day before with Jonathan so we knew a little of what to expect. The man that owns the place we are staying graciously took us and picked us up...we didn't get home until 2. We were told he had a bacterial infection and we were given meds and headed home. Saturday he still seemed down...mostly watched movies all day. Sunday he went outside for a while but by evening was pretty droopy again. Monday was a bit the same. Tuesday morning he woke up suddenly and was doing the terrible moaning thing again. He had a high fever but said nothing hurt. He laid in bed all morning moaning. In the afternoon my sweet friend Hellen met us at the hospital (no more clinic) and pushed our way through the chaos. She requested a specific doctor for us and that was a GOD send! As soon as we got there they took his temperature and before it even beeped they took us to another room- gave him strong medicine to get his fever down and took off all his clothes to give him a washcloth bath to bring down his fever. During that time they put something in his hand to administer medicine and took blood. We were then sent to wait to see the doctor. He slept on me the whole time. When we got in to see the doctor she was so sweet! She told us that he had pneumonia, a bad bacterial infection that was in danger of turning into meningitis if it was not treated quickly and properly (aka- no going home and doing medicine on our own). Hellen told me she would stay the night with us and I shed a few tears. Just a couple and the only ones the whole time. I'm very proud of myself. :) We were sent upstairs to a "private room". This sounds fancy but in fact it is just a room to yourself. Usually there are 4 people to a room. I'm grateful that this was available for us- we paid for it- but whatever it cost (not much) was worth it!! We were in the hospital for 2 days (basically 3 by the time we were actually discharged- that is the worst part of any hospital visit in any country!!) Hellen once again came in to help speed along the leaving process. God's big story of starting our friendship over a year ago in Jacksonville while she was visiting from Uganda with Samaritans Purse for children receiving heart surgeries is absolutely amazing to me. He knew that she would need our help then and we would need her help now. It was SO nice to have a friend to chat with for hours too. Being stuck in a hospital room is a great time to catch up. Matthew was SO great the entire time we were in the hospital. Sweet to the nurses (who were so kind to us), doctors, took his medicine as best a 3 year old can (flavored medicines that are tolerable don't seem to be a thing here.) and didn't hog the bed too much at night. :) We did share the hospital bed- I'm thankful it fit us both because it was the only option of furniture in the room!

When we got home it was around 4 and the restaurant at the place we are staying had been willing to special cook us Thanksgiving dinner with a turkey and mashed potatoes!! After snacking on crackers for 3ish days I was SO excited to eat real food! It was good to be back with our friends and all together as a family.

Friday we went to a craft market so that Adam's mom could see some stuff and buy some stuff before she left. With the chaos of everyone being sick we hadn't had a free day. That was really fun and we saw some neat things. Andrew cried the entire way there, while we were there walking around in the red clay, and the whole way home. The rest of us had a good time I think. Haha.

Saturday we hung around the house. Jonathan got a fever that continued to get higher. I took him to the clinic that night. I'm getting to be pretty darn good at African clinics at night by myself! They said it was a viral infection and if he wasn't better in a few days to come back....um... ok thanks.

We aren't allowed to post pictures of him until we are home. So this will have to do. :) He was sleeping on me at the clinic with his little hand resting on my waist. Be still my heart.

Sunday we hung out again. With all the sickness we didn't brave church this week. Jonathan didn't seem to be improving.

Monday was a sad day. We hung around the house most of the day because it was Adam's last day with us. We wanted to just have family time. We did end up going to the store to get a few last minute things before he left. I was down to 2 bottles of water and without clean water here that's bad news. We ate dinner together after he packed and then had to say goodbye. Ugh. So sad. He headed back to the house (we had eaten outside) before me and as I was walking home I started to cry. The thing running through my mind was, "This isn't how it should be. He shouldn't have to leave us half way around the world. We are now a family of 5 that is about to be split up again." My friend Jenni came walking up to me and gave me a hug and said, "This isn't how it should be." MY WORDS EXACTLY!! Her husband is back in America too. I guess that's how everyone feels. But...bills still pile up in America even if you aren't living there. And work must go on I suppose. Another dad was leaving the same night so there were many many tears. Family isn't meant to be split up. I'm thankful for God's design of family. I'm thankful I've never had to deal with permanent splits in families in my life. God has blessed me with parents that are still married and amazing grandparents as well. It's a rare thing these days. I can't imagine having to say goodbye to someone I love on a regular basis.

As I walked back inside the boys were waiting for me. Matthew just lost it. We sat and cried for a while together. It is so sad because he understands now what is happening. He gets that daddy is gone and will be for a while. There was no way I could explain it to him- I just let him know I am sad too. The boys then asked for a drink so I went to the kitchen to get it. Thankfully Jonathan was already asleep so my hands were empty. Matthew and Andrew followed close at my heels and I felt a wave of panic wash over me as I realized I'm on my own for almost a month. These kids are great...but they are A LOT to handle. All of them are so young. The theme song of this trip has been Great is Thy Faithfulness. I started singing it and got the baths ready. After bath the sun was down and the electricity was out (it has been for days) so we did bedtime by flashlight. The boys handled that surprisingly well. I took a shower and headed to bed. EXHAUSTED and preparing for a day on my own today.

Andrew woke up at midnight screaming. I went to check on him and then he seemed to be fully awake. So we were up until 2:30. He cried most of the time. A headache was coming on and I was desperate to sleep! Eventually he went back to sleep and I crawled back in my bed. Jonathan's snoring sounded like two animals fighting so I laid awake a while longer.

All three families here now are without the daddies. The one whose husband/daddy had left a while ago knew what the others of us were going through. Her and her kids made invitations and invited us all to their house Tuesday morning for a pancake breakfast!! So sweet and thoughtful. The boys GOBBLED up the pancakes. I think they would've kept eating forever! It touched my heart and clearly touched their tummies.

After breakfast all three of the boys and myself headed back to the hospital for Matthew's recheck. I was SO nervous about this. Jonathan was in the carrier, Matthew walking, and Andrew slowly walking or me trying to carry him. He has been SUPER fussy since we've been here and is not an easy going child. He also doesn't talk yet which always causes issues when trying to communicate with each other. Our driver here took us to the hospital. He is AMAZING! The boys and I went inside, checked in and waited. And waited. And waited. We had run out of crackers, our water was low, the entertainment I had brought was no longer entertaining and the doctor was not in yet. Apparently there isn't a specific show up to work time. We were about 5th in line to see her whenever she showed up. She eventually showed up and saw the other patients quickly (thank you Jesus)- and it was our turn. She checked Matthew and gave him the ok. I asked her if she would mind checking Andrew's ear to see if it was infected. He's had problems with that for a while. I told her that I would go back and check him in and pay etc if there was a problem- I just wondered if she would check while we were there. She was so gracious and checked him. Sure enough...ear infection. While she was doing all of that Jonathan was coughing and snotting everywhere. She said he needed to be checked too. She wrote down on a piece of paper the names of the medicines and instructions for them for both Andrew and Jonathan and told me where to go to get them filled at a different pharmacy so the hospital wouldn't charge me and we wouldn't have to go through the whole process for the two of them! She also told me of a clinic she works at that takes appointments (not usually a thing here) that we can go to for their rechecks so we don't have to wait!! I wanted to kiss her!! She has been so great the WHOLE time and this really almost sent me over the edge of my trying to hold it together on my first day alone!! Our driver took us to the pharmacy. We had to cross the road. I think it was supposed to be 2 lanes of traffic but in reality was about 4-5 (cars and motorcycles) no exaggeration. Jonathan back in the carrier, Andrew on my hip and the driver carrying Matthew!! He helped push us through the chaos at the pharmacy...back across the street and HOME! I am hoping this will get everybody completely healthy (and Andrew to not be whining and crying all the time) so we can enjoy our time here!!

Poor little guy keeps falling asleep in the car. He's worn out!

So I have survived my first day alone. We ate 3 meals. Had nap time (that has been a little questionable the first few weeks here). Hand washed clothes. Hand washed dishes. Entertained ourselves without electricity again. Took baths. Watched a movie with our saved computer battery time. And all the boys are asleep!! Nothing too glamorous but I'm SO excited. Haha.

Please pray for us. We miss Adam a lot. It was so sad coming back from the hospital today and realizing again that he wasn't back here waiting for us. It was sad to not be able to tell him how the hospital went either because he is still traveling. The time difference will make it so that we can't talk too often which is sad. This is a HUGE thing in our family's story and it's sad to have to keep him updated over the phone. Please pray that all boys get and stay healthy. Pray I continue to stay healthy. God has been so gracious. I haven't felt sick even once! Pray for our ruling that we will have on Friday. Thankfully I don't have to take all the boys with me- Matthew and Andrew will stay behind and play with friends. I'm not sure I could handle all of that with grace and poise. Haha. This is not really important at all but would be so nice- please pray that we have electricity. It has been out for about 3 or 4 days now all day. It doesn't come back on ( and even then not very consistently) until evening. It's 9 right now and still not back on. And when there is no electricity there is no hot water for showers. I can heat water on the gas stove for kids baths but not for a mommy shower. Like I said...just a luxury but one I would appreciate. :) Maybe you could think to pray for it while you are doing anything that involves needing electricity through out your day. Haha.

I honestly am not even re-reading this post at all. I started typing it SO long ago and so much has happened. Maybe from here on out on my evenings alone I can find time to write more. Forgive me if it doesn't make too much sense or if there are a million spelling errors. Hope you can enjoy the update on what has happened here. I love it here and am so happy to get to spend so much time here. I wish it could be as our whole family together but thankfully Adam does get to come back at Christmas!! God is FAITHFUL and overly generous in His provision of community, helpful Ugandan staff from our agency, and nothing TOO serious medically. Please praise Him with us for these things.