Moon Shine Down

When Matthew was born someone gave us the book The Moon Shines Down. It is by the same person that wrote Goodnight Moon. The pictures in it are beautiful!
Recently that has been his favorite book-we read it at least 4 times a day. I have it memorized and so does he. I love to stop reading and hear him finish the sentence for me. :)
Of course that was his choice before bed tonight, "Moon Shine Down"- so we all piled in the chair to read. All on his own Matthew held Andrews hand-the WHOLE time. It was so sweet to me! He loves his brother so much-I love watching it. I hope that it continues throughout their lives!




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Snapshots of my day

A few pictures from my Mother's Day...





Adam and I promising to raise Andrew according to God's word. Doug prayed for him. What a blessing.




I got a FABULOUS gift from the boys in my life- a bracelet! I love it! So far I have a heart charm that says MOM and two little boys that say BROTHERS on the bottom of it. My wonderful husband brought me flowers. I always enjoy flowers but these are going to be extra appreciated because he left today for 5 days! And finally...I got to take a wonderful nap. Matthew and Andrew did too. It was so refreshing!



Since I am a single mom this week I am going to have to be wise and efficient with my time! So-my first way of doing that was to have the boys take a bath together for the first time instead of trying to find time for 2 separate baths. It was a success! I'm excited for the day that the boys will have fun playing together in the bath! Matthew had fun splashing and Andrew survived. I think I've bought myself a few extra minutes in a day...

As you can see-I had a great day!

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My job

I have had a rough last couple weeks at my job. I have felt completely inadequate for it. Matthew has been a handful and unfortunately it's usually when my hands are full with Andrew.
The other day I had run out of ways that seemed to get through to him before lunch time. It was very frustrating. I was angry and not loving like I should've been. I was so happy when nap time came! Normally on a hard day-by the time nap time is over I'm ready to have him up again. This day I still wasn't ready. I decided that we needed to just sit on the couch together as he woke up so that we could snuggle and have some good moments together. It was good for me! I realized in that time he had already forgotten-or at least forgiven the earlier part of the day. I was amazed at the lovingness of little ones. There was no grudge carried over after his nap time. He has not learned to harbor things yet. He loves me like crazy no matter what right now! I learned a lesson from Matthew that day.
As mothers day is here I am more aware than ever of the fact that this is a high calling I have-and a more difficult one than anyone prepares you for! All that I thought motherhood would be about is just the tip of the iceberg. I need God's grace and wisdom each moment as I try to raise boys that will grow up to bring glory go God in everything they do. This task seems impossible to me at the moment because all I feel like I can see right now is the huge obstacle of their lack of salvation! I pray hard for them to know Jesus-even at such young ages. I do not want there to be a time in their life that they look back on and realize they wasted it for causes other than those of Jesus. Consistency is key-but it is so hard to do when there seem to be no results at the moment. Boy-I realize how impatient I am! Being a model of Jesus to these boys is a BIG task!
I am thankful-even though it is hard-that these two little boys are tools for my sanctification. They are a handful but they are also such a joy. Matthews sweet little voice melts my heart. Yesterday at the pool he ran over to me and said "Mommy! Tiss! (kiss)" His giggle makes me laugh! How proud he is of block towers he makes,or how he lines up his cars, and just wants to show them off to me makes me feel so prized. The way he holds my neck when I hold him, and how he holds my hand whenever we sit together literally make my heart feel like it is going to explode! And Andrew. He is still so tiny and sweet. When his big eyes look at me it gets me every single time! I love when he falls asleep on me-or when I'm the only one who can calm him down. Having to feed him every few hours is tiring but it is also such an honor to be such a vital and important part of his life. Getting to watch his sleepy little face at night after I put him in bed is a favorite of mine!
Today we dedicated Andrew back to the Lord at church. It is the only place I want him and I know I am less than capable on my own to make anything worthy of him without the Lord's help! I am so thankful to have a husband that loves our boys so well-and is on the same page as me on how we are to raise them and what we want our family priorities to be.
Today I recognized that I am beyond blessed and beyond overwhelmed with this beautiful responsibility I've been given. I am also so thankful for my own mother who is such an example of selfless love and sacrifice. Happy mothers day to all those moms out there that feel tired, overwhelmed, and extra blessed!
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Relief

Poor little Andrew has problems with gas build up in his tummy. It is always worst at night before bed and after the earliest morning feeding. It is the saddest thing to watch because he is obviously in so much discomfort and there's nothing to do about it.
We have heard miracle stories from friends about taking babies to the chiropractor-so we figured we'd give it a try to see if it would help him feel better.
Today Dr. Shaw adjusted Andrew. It was the most delicate little adjustment ever. :) She was just a chiropractor I found online and was kind of nervous to not have a personal referral to her but she was SO WONDERFUL! And so was all of the staff there.
Andrew slept all day after getting his adjustment-and I had to change lots of diapers! :) I think things are working a lot more smoothly now and he seems to rest so much more peacefully. I'm so grateful. Hopefully he continues to improve. This morning feeding that he is doing as I write is going SO much better than usual! Praise the Lord. Our bodies are such intricate things. I'm so thankful for babies with good health-and for a way to help them that is not just medicine. Yesterday I tried to feed Andrew for 40 minutes and he was so uncomfortable he only could get about 8 minutes of eating total because of his gas. I'm so grateful that this seems to be working. Happy baby=happy mommy. Now if we could get obedient toddler it would equal a much happier mommy! :) One thing at a time I supposed...




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Zombie Mode

There would've been more posts since the last one if I knew how to use the app on my phone. I have typed up many entries only to have them deleted because I didn't know how to save them. My anger/frustration would lead to not retyping my post-and you not having anything to read. I think I have figured it out now so hopefully that won't happen anymore!! Hopefully...
Our computer has also been broken for a few months. We now have a new computer and it is wonderful! I am enjoying getting to know its new features. Yesterday I face-timed my parents from the computer! :)
Since the last time I successfully posted was in January-you can imagine that a lot has happened. Matthew sleeps in a big boy bed.




He is also talking up a storm! I think his little voice is so sweet (most of the time). Haha. The way he pronounces words with a little lisp is precious to me. The boy loves to tell stories! When he, is he does this thing in between words that sounds like "uh uh"and a laugh-because he is so into and excited about what he's saying.
He is learning how to have first time obedience. When his little voice says "sorry" it melts my heart. We are also trying to teach him manners. He's pretty good at saying please. He will say thank you when you remind him, which sounds like "wah wook." Not sure where that comes from but to me it's sweet.
Matthew is also now a big brother... And an excellent one at that!
Andrew Caleb joined us on March 30th at 5:05 AM. He was 8 lb. 6 oz. and 21 3/4 inches long. The delivery went great.








I am so blessed to have been given two sweet little boys to care for.












Meeting Andrew for the first time.




My three boys




On our way home!
Since we have been home things have been much easier than I expected. Matthew had/has some obedience issues but he has always been sweet to Andrew which I am so thankful for! I'm sure his disobedience has something to do with being 2 now! And of course because he is a sinner. At least he gives me many reminders a day to pray that he will know Jesus at a young age!




Andrew is a great baby! He fell into a schedule so easily. I never knew how you could love one child as much as another-but I'm thankful that I do now! I crave the snuggly moments with Matthew as I read him books or lay with him in bed as he wakes up. I also love the snuggle times with Andrew when Matthew is napping and it's just our time.
I get so excited thinking about Matthew and Andrew becoming friends as they grow up. Matthew is such a sweet big brother. I look forward to seeing what this looks like as they get older.
I have heard many stories from friends and people I don't know recently of children lost. Whether it was before they have been born or after. I feel so sick to my stomach when I hear about these things. I know how precious my boys are to me and am deeply sad for those that have lost those children that they have loved with the same intensity. It reminds me to be verbally thankful to the Lord for his gifts to me. I cannot imagine going through the loss of a child. I know that he provides grace and strengthen for those moments but I cannot imagine experiencing that. I am blessed by many of these people's testimonies to God's faithfulness to them-and their confidence in his plan and care for their little ones. Should I ever be put through that trial I pray I respond like them. Jesus is lifted higher and that is obvious. I did not mean for any of that to be depressing but it is something that has been in my heart lately-thankfulness for my boys and my heartbreak for those who have lost children.
I did experience my own temporary loss 2 weeks ago with the death of my grandpa. He had been battling Parkinson's. I am so thankful that even though his battle was suffering-he did not suffer very long compared to what it could be. The confused state that he lived in because of the fogginess of his mind and the pain and inability because of his failing body makes it impossible to not rejoice in his being taken out of that suffering. And when I know that this Jesus-loving, Jesus-focused man is now living with Jesus I can be at peace! We traveled to NC for his memorial service. It was a very precious time celebrating who my grandpa was with all the family and friends that got to attend.

Since being home from NC we have been keeping busy! Lots of time playing outside and spending time with friends. It is starting to feel like summer so water events are fun but not too miserable yet! :)

This weekend it is just me and the boys. We have 2 birthday parties so we should stay pretty busy!

This post was pretty random and covered a large period of time but it feels good to have written. I am now nursing in the middle of the night and apparently my Facebook friends are not awake to post things all night to keep me entertained so it is a great time to blog! Also-if things don't make complete sense-please remember...it was written in the middle of the night! :)

Until next time...

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A Cold Beginning

This year has started off crazy and cold! Since January 1st I have been home for 3 days!

We rung in the new year with a special occasion. Adam and I had the privilege to be a part of Phil and Kristin Freo's wedding! I was the coordinator (my first time doing it alone- and nothing went wrong so I am very excited!) and Adam officiated the wedding. Adam has known Phil since the early days, and I met Kristin the summer I moved to Jacksonville when she was still in high school. Adam played matchmaker for them the summer after Kristin graduated and now they are MARRIED! :) We love them both very much and it was so wonderful to be able to spend new years celebrating them! These two love Jesus and I can't wait to see what they accomplish for Him with their lives now combined.

On January 2nd Adam and I headed out to Atlanta with the college kids to attend Passion 2012. This was our third time attending Passion. We went for the first time right when we started dating in 2007 then we went in 2010 and now in 2012. In 2010 I was 8 months pregnant and this time I was 6 months pregnant! They DO NOT design Passion for pregnant women that is for sure! :) Lots of walking, standing, sitting in hard seats, sitting on cement floors, LONG lines for bathrooms, and it was VERY cold- but I had a BLAST! It was such a refreshing time to be reminded of truths of the scripture, and get to worship with thousands of other people that love Jesus and want to see His glory spread through out the earth! The group of students we took were fabulous- I enjoyed every moment with them! We left Matthew with his Pops and Milly for a few days and I think he had tons of fun- I was very happy to get home to my baby though!

When we got back from Passion we had just enough time to unpack, do laundry, repack, and spend some quality time with Anthony Alvarez. He was home from England for a very short amount of time- and we wanted as much of that time as he would give us! We got to spend Thursday night, and Friday morning hanging out with Anthony and getting to know his girlfriend Ali. She was SO sweet and it was so exciting to meet someone that we had been hearing about for a while. Of course I shed lots of tears when he had to leave- June seems so far away- but I am very excited that Anthony is getting a chance to study God's word and in such a wonderful setting in England.

Once we had everything repacked we headed out to NC to visit my family. It was time for 2nd Christmas! I missed a few Christmases with my family in college while they lived overseas so I get really excited anytime I get to spend some sort of holiday with them! It was fun for them to experience Matthew doing Christmas. He was such a joy this year with opening gifts, and actually being excited about the things inside- not just the bows! After a few days, and of course a sub sandwich from Sub Station II (my FAVORITE) Adam and I were headed out again. This time Matthew was staying with Grandma and Grandpa (Papa).

We were blessed to be able to go on vacation with friends to Boone, NC. Having time away from Matthew's schedule and any responsibility was very refreshing for me! It was fun to just have time with Adam and friends too. We got to stay in a house on the edge of the mountain that was gorgeous! We even got snow a few of the days we were there which made our mountain trip complete! I ate lots of snow, lots of good food, played lots of games (which I love!), went snow tubing, leaned on the wind at Grandfather Mountain, went on a hike in a beautiful place along a little stream, and got to hang out with friends. It was so FABULOUS! I was bundled up like an Eskimo most of the time because it was so chilly- but it was a great break from the Florida heat.

Adam headed back to Florida yesterday with our friends while I came back to NC to spend some more time with my family and to be back with Matthew. He had a good time with Grandma and Grandpa- and keeps asking for cookies. I don't know what that means! Haha. Adam is headed out to Costa Rica at the end of the this week to check out the place we will be going with the youth group this summer so I figured since he would be gone I would stay here and get to spend some more time with my parents. Matthew and I miss Daddy a lot though.

This morning Matthew and I went on an adventure around Waxhaw- we did a little of each of Matthew's favorite things. We threw lots and lots and lots of rocks into the pond at the JAARS center. Matthew learned how to say the word splash today. I think that kid could "throw" forever and never get sick of it. I was afraid we were going to take so many rocks from the driveway near the pond that a car would get stuck there so we moved on to the next stop of our adventure. We went to look at airplanes at Grandma and Papa's work. Unfortunately no airplanes were flying/landing so it wasn't very exciting- but we still got to see some that were on the ground. After the airplanes we went to swing for a while- that is another thing I think Matthew could do forever! It cracks me up because he LOVES to swing and when it is time to be done it is always a tragedy, but while he is swinging he looks like he zones out and isn't having any fun at all! Just relaxing I guess... We played a little ball after swinging and then it was time to go visit Grandma and Papa's offices. We got to color some pictures there before we came home for lunch. It was a busy, fun, adventuresome morning! So much so- that Matthew went down early for his nap. I guess all of our fun wore him out- MOMMY SUCCESS!

This year has been so much fun already. It is crazy to think about all that has already happened in such a short amount of time. What will the next 348 days hold for me?! One thing I am very much looking forward to is meeting my newest little boy Andrew. This little nugget has been moving around so much the past couple weeks and it is making me antsy to meet him. Only 74 more days until my due date- in certain ways that feels like no time at all- and in other ways it seems like forever! I am so blessed to already have two wonderful guys in my life. I have a husband that loves me so very much and works so hard to provide for our family. He loves me much better than I deserve and I am thankful for the Godly example he is for Matthew and will be for Andrew. I also have a little boy that so far in his life adores me and is so sweet. I thank God all the time for how he created Matthew's personality to fit so snugly right into my heart! I pray often for Andrew and what his personality will be like. I can't wait to watch him develop and learn what makes him unique. I want my boys to live their lives to make much of Jesus and not themselves- and as I pray towards that end I can't wait to see how God answers. God is about HIS glory and nothing can get in the way of that. I am so thankful to be able to live a life of purpose that I know cannot be thwarted. As long as I keep my goal God's goal then I know that I will succeed. That is very reassuring.

Where has time gone?

Well- I was hoping to blog a lot and then life happened! Things got kind of crazy and finding time to get all of my responsibilities done, AND blog just was not possible.

The first thing that kept me from blogging was that I got attacked by morning sickness! :) The first couple months of pregnancy are pretty rough for me. It took all I had to make sure Matthew was fed, bathed, and entertained in between being sick and wanting to sleep. So blogging about any of that for sure did not interest me! Good news- I am no longer feeling sick. Matthew is still healthy, fed, cleaned, and entertained. I made it through! We are expecting little boy #2 on April 1st. Well- I'm actually hoping for a different birthday for him- but that is the date the doctors have given us. So far everything is looking good they say. I had my glucose test today- hopefully I pass. The GT I had with Matthew was right after Halloween and I passed even though I was a candy-eating-fool! And now this one was right after Christmas-so if I pass it will be another miracle! Haha.

The second big thing that happened for our family is that we moved in October! With an expanding family, horrible economy, and a wonderful family I have married into we found ourselves doing a house swap. We could not sell our house at the moment, but were running out of space to have 2 little ones, and our sanity. My in-laws offered to switch houses with us. They have been a huge blessing to Adam and I through out our marriage- but this offer blew my mind. They had a house with an extra bedroom, 1 1/2 bathrooms, office/playroom than what we had. They were selfless enough to give up their extra space so that we could fill it- and take our smaller space. The move was a bit overwhelming and exhausting. I had only ever packed my personal belongings for a move before- and now I had to pack a whole house with a toddler "helping" any way he could! Everything did get packed- and thanks to the help of some of the Sr. Highers it got moved as well! We got settled just in time for...

THE HOLIDAYS! Another wave of craziness took over with Thanksgiving (traveling to see my family in NC) and all that is involved with Christmas (decorating, shopping, wrapping, baking, parties...). With my new found love of Pinterest I wanted to make a lot of Christmas gifts this year. I had a lot of fun doing all my little projects- but I've learned that it takes a long time to be crafty and creative! :) The Thanksgiving- Christmas time is my favorite time of year- but somehow it is already gone. I feel like life has been one crazy whirlwind recently.Christmas was so much fun this year with Matthew. He enjoyed opening presents, and was really excited about all of the new things he got. My wonderful husband made me a dining room table that is so beautiful. It made me cry- which made him happy. :) Our families were once again too good to us, and spending Christmas Eve and Christmas day celebrating with the Alexanders was so much fun. In a few weeks we will get a chance to celebrate with my family- I think the longer break between the celebrations will do Matthew some good. I don't want him turning into a greedy, entitled little nugget. :)

I was sitting on the couch today thinking about new years resolutions. I think most of the time these are pretty dumb because hardly anyone keeps them-at least people I know. But I still felt the need to come up with one for myself. I was honest with myself- exercise will not be my resolution of choice. I hate to exercise and would hate it even more if I set some unattainable standard for myself from the couch. :) I decided that I want to blog more consistently in the new year. I feel like this year is going to hold a lot of excitement and challenges for me. I already have lots of BIG things on the calendar- and it's still only 2011! I think it would be fun to document my journey- and maybe even share it with people if they would care to read about it.

No promises to an entry each day. I have come to realize that I don't know what each day will hold. The days I think are going to be slow somehow turn out the craziest- and the days I think I won't be able to accomplish everything on my list are over and done with faster than I know it. I do resolve to blog consistently though. That is all I can say. :) I'm excited for 2012 and all that God has planned for me in these coming 365 days.